I debated on whether or not to add this to my online store to share with the world as it is so very close to my heart. But I know I am not alone in this battle and hope this can be a source of hope or inspiration for others who have felt or feel this way.
The colours of the earth seem to fade before my weary eyes
But I can't bring back it's brilliance
No matter how hard I try
As the fog settles in, I search for any signs of life
But everything's fragile and still
The silence cuts like a knife
I set off in a hurry, feet barely touching solid ground
I stumble, I fall to the earth
Yet I dare not make a sound
As the milky grey thickens around me, I sneak a timid breath
Something deep in my heart
Seems to feel the touch of death
But just when I feel the wolves are about to charge and close in on me
I am reminded to ask myself again
What this faceless fear could be?
Is it stronger than the mountains I have moved when I thought I'd wake up dead?
Is it stronger than the monsters I've conquered and slain that used to live inside my head?
Is it fear of being vulnerable and stuck in yet another lonely place?
As my mind starts to quiet and return to its usual beat
Something in me awakens
And refuses to admit defeat
With each new breath, my world that had vanished without a trace
Beats in its full majesty
Back to its normal pace
As the fog suddenly lifts and clears, I again pick up my feet
And remind myself again
How grateful I should be to be me.